During one of my visits to Thailand, I attended the Singh Sabha Gurdwara at Bangkok. When I was enjoying Keertan (singing of hymns), the sound of a Jhanjhar(anklet) disturbed the concentration of the Sangat (congregation). My attention, too, was diverted towards the direction of the sound. I immediately blamed myself for loosing my concentration. Why did I bother for the diversion ? The lady who disturbed the Sangat too was guilty. All this made me think that we should have a discipline, an ethics, a culture and a protocol for a visit to a Gurdwara.
When we visit a Gurdwara, our dress should be very simple. Gaudy colours, body exposing clothes, too much of ornaments, arms or other articles, which easily distract the attention of the Sangat, should be avoided. When we disturb the concentration of any devotee, we, in a way, though unknowingly or without any intention, commit a sin. The person whose concentration is disturbed is also guilty for not having been fully attentive. But, his guilt is for himself whereas those, who are responsible for creating such a distraction, are more guilty because they have committed a double sin i.e. abetting others as well as not observing protocol for a visit to a Gurdwara.
Does it mean that a Sikh woman can not wear fine dress or ornaments etc.? A Sikh female has every right to look “presentable”, but, she must not look like an erotic figure, which provokes others’ sexy attention. A female has to decorate herself to attract her husband and not the common male folk. A Sikh female is not a thing of exhibition. There is a difference between a wife and a prostitute. A prostitute has to look erotic or aphrodisiac in order to attract customers. But a wife is not a commodity. Similarly, a Sikh male, too is supposed to love his wife as much as possible but looking at other females with sexual intention is forbidden:
By beholding several beauties man is not appeased. (p. 179)
You are misled on beholding with your eyes for a moment (the beautiful women),
(it is like) the aak (swallow wort), neem (azadirachta), tummar (bitter indica)
As is the companionship of venomous serpent,
so is the ravishing of another person’s wife. (p. 403)
When we visit a Gurdwara, we should have sincerity in our mind. Our purpose in visiting a Gurdwara is to join congregation, listen to or sing the praise of the Almighty, to learn Sikh philosophy, history and culture, to serve the community etc. But, if we visit a Gurdwara just for a formality or show then we are simply hypocrites. A hypocrite does never get God’s blessings:
Those alone who have heart felt love for the Almighty are true persons
Those who have one thing at heart and another in their speech
are accounted false. (p. 488).
A visitor to a Gurdwara must have humility in his behaviour. It is not possible to pass through a big crowd without rubbing your shoulders with others. But being angry, aggressive, jealous, naughty, proud or hurting others is not in consonance with the Sikh ethics. We should try to be very humble in our conversation and behaviour. Hurting the feeling of others is a sin:
Nanak, by speaking dryly (ill), the soul and body become dry
He is called most evil of the evil and evil is his reputation.
The sour-tongued person is discarded in the court of the Almighty
and evil one’s face is spat upon. (p. 473)
and
Utter thou not even a single harsh word, True Master abides among all.
Break not any one’s heart as all are invaluable jewels. (p. 1384).
and
One should banish one’s lust, wrath and self-conceit,
Slay five thieves (vices). (p. 1022)
and
Ego is at variance with the Name of the Almighty
the two can not dwell at one place. (p. 560).
We should visit a Gurdwara with an intention to do some Sewa (community service). We should try to do some Sewa in shoe storage or in the kitchen or cleaning the floors etc. It is true that each and every member of the congregation can not get a chance to participate in Sewa every day but a true Sikh should always have an ardent desire for performing some Sewa. If one cannot do any Sewa in a Gurdwara, he/she can perform Sewa through other means too. Serving community in any manner is like doing Sewa in a Gurdwara. Sewa is an important part of a Sikh’s life:
In the world perform Sewa (service)
Then shall you get a place in the court of the Almighty. (p. 26).
But on the other hand if we perform Sewa for show or for exhibition, instead of being a positive activity, it will be considered negative. Similarly, we should not perform Sewa even forcibly, nor it should be done under some compulsion:
If we shun ego, perform service,
then we can have honour in His Court (p. 474)
and
If one serves without the desire for a reward
he can achieve union with the Almighty (p.286)
While doing Sewa one must keep two things in his mind: (1) One should not discriminate between one or another while performing Sewa (2) Sewa should not be done just for show. One, who just performs Sewa for show, is a hypocrite and his Sewa is futile, and, is not acceptable to the Almighty. He, rather, becomes a greater sinner:
One who does it (Sewa) as an act of rivalry
is a self-willed person without understanding
If some one does it with pure heart,
his service is accepted in the court of Almighty (p. 28)
and
He, who is susceptible to self-praise and self-disgrace
is not the real-service doer. (p. 51).
and
In the fine prisoner pays (service done under compulsion)
there is neither merit nor goodness. (p. 787).
Before entering a Gurdwara, a Sikh must leave his ‘self’ (ego), group-ism, enmity, jealousy, hatred, anger, disdain, likes and dislikes outside the building of the Gurdwara. If we visit a Gurdwara with hatred, hypocrisy, flattery, pride of power, wealth or body, vanity or ego in our mind then we are not genuine visitor to a Gurdwara. It would mean that we had not gone there as devotees and the purpose of our visit was not spiritual or religious. A Gurdwara is not a club or a meeting place or a social centre. It is a spiritual zone and our purpose should be meditation, Sewa, humanism, generosity, love, sacrifice, humbleness etc.
A Gurdwara is a place where one can’t even flatter the others. If opposition, condemnation or criticism of some one are alien to Gurdwara ethics then flattery or undue praise of a speaker or leader or any other person too is a sin. In a Gurdwara we can sing in the praise of God only:
The praise (only of) the Almighty is sung
(and) Divine Light descends from firmament and heavenly bodies. (p. 967).
Gurdwara belongs to every Sikh, hence every Sikh is equally welcome there. The stage of the Gurdwara is meant neither for flattery nor for condemnation of any person. A Sikh must never condemn the faith of other people. It does not mean that Sikhs can not refer to the principles and history of other religions even for comparison sake. Likewise, one who has harmed the Sikh nation, can be criticised in a Gurdwara. We can talk about Sikh philosophy. Sikhism, Sikh culture, Sikh national issues in the presence of Guru Granth Sahib. Even this has to be done with due respect to the Guru Granth Sahib.
We should try to learn Sikh ethics from Gurdwara. Simplicity, humility, solemnity, devotion, spiritualism, desire for Sewa, impartiality, pious-ness, Sikh national commitment, love and respect etc. is the culture of a Gurdwara. If we bring all this with us or we try to learn this, then our visit to a Gurdwara is meaningful otherwise it is just a formality, show, hypocrisy and sheer ritual; hence a sin. Before visiting a Gurdwara one must ask oneself: “How should I visit a Gurdwara?”
(Dr Harjinder Singh Dilgeer)